Chapter 13: What "This" is

A friend is missed.
A secret is discovered.
A connection grows.
Christina gets an unexpected visitor.

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Day 19
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Ever since Damien was hired, I had found myself spending more and more time in the garden. I used to spend nearly equal amounts of my free time either in the library or in my room, but now that Raphael was gone and Damien had taken his place there was nothing stopping me from spending my time relaxing outside among nature. Even though it had only been two days since Damien started, the garden was noticeably different; new flowers had been planted everywhere you could look. Before, while the garden had an aura of foreign beauty to it, now amidst all the Silencian plants new familiar selections of local flora were scattered about. Just knowing that the garden was now designed with a thought for Crevician beauty made me feel better about it.

Being out here now, book in hand, part of me also hoped I might see Damien as he went about his work. In one conversation with him I learned more about local wildlife than I had in my entire life living back at Revallia Manor, despite our own well kept gardens. I wondered if he might tell me more about the different plants he added to the grounds, teach me about their local stories like he did the Napaesse Orchid.

Sadly at the moment, even as I looked around the area Damien wasn't anywhere to be seen. I had very little understanding of his work schedule, but I hoped I might get the chance to learn it. Still content regardless of Damien's presence, I sat down and began to read. There was no telling exactly how long until Lena or Cynthia decided I needed supervision and that my alone time would be over. 

A few minutes passed as I lost myself in my book, a fairytale about a prince who was forced to go into hiding before falling in love with a farmgirl; another of Lena's recommendations. It was simple and cliché, but I liked it. Naturally it wasn't more than a few minutes until I was interrupted, though not from who I expected.

"Hey rich girl, fancy house you got here." 

Despite the fact that I immediately recognized the voice and tone that could only belong to one person, I still nearly fell out of my seat. Dropping my book in surprise, I looked up to confirm what I already knew to be true. 

Leaning against the tree next to me stood Hazel. Looking a little more tidied up today than usual. Her sandpaper hair looked more windswept than disheveled, and wearing a pair of black trousers that were considerable less worn than the ones I had seen her in before. And although she still wore the same brown jacket, it looked slightly cleaner. I could tell she was taking care of herself.

"Hazel!" I yelped more loudly than I intended. "What are you doing here?" I asked, lowering my voice to compensate. The way she stood back with that smirk on her face, I could tell she enjoyed getting the drop on me. I imagine she'd snuck this close before saying anything just to get a good reaction. 

"Good to see you too." She retorted. Hazel's confidence stood in sharp contrast to my visible shock.

Suddenly the reality of my situation hit me. I had no idea how Hazel got here, but she was here none the less, and the implication of that was what truly lifted my spirits. However she got here, she came here just to see me. In the only way I could immediately think of showing my appreciation, I jumped out of my seat and threw my arms around Hazel. Startled as my hug crashed into her, she grabbed my shoulders and slowly pried me off of her, noticeably surprised at the reaction. 

"Okay, easy there babes." She cautioned as she pulled away, laughing lightly at the situation.

I awkwardly stepped back, realizing how embarrassing I might seem. "Right, sorry. . ." I said, my gaze shifting to the ground.

After a few seconds of silence that followed, Hazel then reached out and playfully punched my shoulder to break the awkwardness. "Dork." She jabbed at me with a smile. 

I returned a smile back to her, though as my momentary excitement waned I was left with my questions unanswered. "Okay but seriously, what are you doing here? How did you even find out where I lived?" I asked, looking around to make sure we were alone. The realization that my guardians might discover my friend was slowly dawning on me.

Hazel put her hands in her jacket pockets casually and shrugged. "First day we met you told me you lived in some estate south of the city, and then after the other day I waited by the edge of town until I saw your coach leaving. After that I just followed the tracks." She looked at me with what I could have sworn was a tinge of concern. "So I thought I would drop by to see how you were doing."

The way she talked about tracking me down here made it sound so simple, but I could never have imagined doing any of that myself. Her resourcefulness amazed me. Though despite how capable I knew she was, I was still nervous. "Aren't you worried about someone seeing you, out in the open like this?" I said, my head still on a swivel.

Hazel gave me a quick smirk, like she found my caution adorable. "Don't worry, I cased the place out. Mummy and daddy are both busy for the time being, chatting with that one butch looking girl the last few minutes." 

The nicknames made me roll my eyes. Hearing that Hazel scouted out the manor before approaching didn't surprise me, and while I did trust her I was still cautious. "You sure?" I asked, moving to sit on the ground, thinking it would make us as hidden as possible.

"Positive." Replied Hazel, nodding as she too sat down, her back resting against the tree. "Why you so worried about the others seeing me anyway?" She asked.

It was a fair question, but one I didn't want to answer. I shuffled my feet in the ground as I tried to think of a way to avoid the question. Hazel was having none of it. "What, are you embarrassed of having a street rat for a friend?" She teased sassily, pulling back her head in mock offense. 

Despite the joking tone of the question, a pang of guilt struck me as I rushed an answer. "No! It's not that, I promise. It's just . . ." I paused to think to myself before continuing. "I have no idea what they might get me in trouble for. I don't want to risk it." Even as I spoke it didn't feel like I was telling her the full truth. Why was I holding back from her? I wasn't really ashamed of being friends with her, was I?

For the first time Hazel looked genuinely puzzled. She tilted her head as she tried to understand the situation. "Who are those three to you Chris?" She asked, her tone consistent in its weighted concern. "What is this?" 

That was a question I wanted to answer even less. Even if I wanted to it felt so confusing even for me. I struggled to even imagine what I might tell her. "They're . . . my guardians." I answered, wrestling with the words as they came out of my mouth.

Hazel stared me up and down, studying my answer. There was something about her eyes, the way she looked at me. It felt like she could see past the façade of who I was pretending to be and saw my very soul. Even as I wanted to look away, there was just something about her eyes that stopped me.

After a few moments she decided it was time to take the lead. "Let me tell you what it looks like from my end." She shifted her body forward, resting her arms on her knees. "Rich girl, living with a bunch of rich invader diplomats. They have some level of control over you, which is why they dress you like you're a child. At some point you tried fighting back, but that didn't work out and now you're always on edge." I was taken aback by her summary, her assumptions were so vague but yet she said them with complete certainty. Even with all that she had said she wasn't finished. "You hate how the missus treats you, and you're terrified of the butch girl. You hate being here with them, but you stay because something worse scares the shit out of you." She said, still full of conviction, before finally softening her tone for her last observation. "But even then, you're also alone. No friends and no family left, so they're all you've got." 

Once she had finished I didn't immediately respond, instead sitting and stewing in the moment. I was shocked by her accuracy, but rather than impressed I almost felt offended. I didn't tell her any of those things, she was just pulling at straws and coming up lucky. She didn't understand the situation I was in, and to reduce it to a handful of statements to throw around was demeaning. 

"There's more to it than that!" I protested angrily, though not entirely sure whether I was angry at her, my situation, or myself.

Hazel raised her palms in mock surrender. "Okay, tell me what's going on then." She said innocently.

My anger faded out of me as I realized just how misplaced it was. Lashing out at Hazel wasn't good for anyone, right now she was one of the only people who I could consider a friend. 

As I cooled down, I took a moment to think. I remembered Damien, being given Arthur, and the few genuine moments I had with Lena. It wasn't all as bad as Hazel made it out to be. 

"The 'missus' name is Lena, and I don't hate her." I said, my words coded with a hint of defiance. "Sometimes she's a little overbearing, but she's nice to me." Now that I had started, the words began to come out more easily. "I don't always understand why she does what she does, but I know she wants to help." I said, starting to trail off near the end, defiance turning to uncertainty. I thought back to the moments when she had tried to help me. Specifically when she tried to give me gifts that she thought would make me feel better; the music box and Arthur. Though even now the both of those gestures felt like they had a hollow ring to them.

Hazel looked at me with kind eyes, trying to understand as best she could. "You look sad Christina." She said, her voice etched with a compassion that stood in stark contrast to her usual persona. 

I tried to shake off the feeling, and persuade my friend I was fine. "No it's nothing. It's just. . ." I paused for a moment, pondering if I really wanted to continue. "Well, the other day Lena gave me a stuffed bear. She thought it might make me sleep better. It was really nice and all, but sometimes all it does is remind me of my old stuffed animal, thats all." I said quietly, almost ashamed that a childhood stuffy could have such an affect on me.

To my surprise Hazel cracked a smile at me, and leaned back against the tree trunk behind her. "Tell me about your old one." She said warmly.

I blinked back my confusion, the sudden encouragement, without any lip no less, feeling out of place for what I'd come to expect from Hazel. But rather than look a gift horse in the mouth, I did as she asked. "His . . . name was Argus. He's a stuffed wolf that I've had for nearly as long as I can remember." I began. Hazel nodded at me encouragingly, so I worked up my courage and continued. "My family, the Revallia family, our symbol is the raven and our crest is a raven in front of a tree, flanked by two wolves. All my life my mother would tell me the tales about how in the forests of our ancestors, ravens would hunt together with packs of wolves. The ravens acting like scouts and guides, while the wolves would protect the ravens in turn. So Argus, he was my wolf, and I was his raven. We kept each other safe." As I retold the tale that my parents had passed on to me, I could feel the longing in my heart grow like a wound that never fully healed. I knew I missed Argus, but I hadn't realized just how empty part of me felt without him.

Hazel looked at me with a sadness in her eyes that mirrored my own. She tried briefly to crack smile before asking another question. "What happened to him?" She asked, I could see in her face there was a small amount of dread that awaited the answer, like she feared the worst.

I paused for a moment. I knew exactly where he was, but the memory was still a painful one. "Locked up forever in that god forsaken treasury warehouse." I said with bitter defeat. "I even saw him there, the same day we met actually. But I told you how that ended."

Hazel looked back at me, nodding in sympathetic understanding, but saying nothing. Realizing the moment that I caught myself in, I tried to shake my feelings away, reminding myself of what I did have instead. "But it's okay. Arthur, the bear that Lena gave me, he's really nice as well." I said, feeling that if I said it confidently enough I might start to believe it myself. 

I suddenly realized just how ridiculous it was to be talking about stuffed animals like this. I was a grown woman and I didn't need a stuffy to keep me safe at night, it didn't matter how many nightmares I was having. I leaned back as I propped my weight up on my palms behind me, trying as best as I could to emulate Hazel's natural swagger. "Not that any of that really matters anyway. They're both just toys." I said dismissively.

My friend met me with a raised eyebrow, clearly deciding how much she wanted to push me. Ultimately she decided against it. "Tell you what though. . ." She said, pushing her way off the trunk she was sitting against, and shuffling over to sit next to me. "The clothes look good on you." 

I couldn't help but laugh at her statement. It was the last thing I could have expected her to say in the moment, and not something I could remotely believe. I stared back at her with that same energy. "There's no way you believe that, I mean look at me." I said leaning back to give her a broad view.

She laughed back at me in turn. "Oh trust me, it's hard not to." She said sarcastically. We both laughed at the absurdity of the bit, settling back down after a few moments of joy.

I looked over again at Hazel, her dirty blond hair pushed back by the gentle gusts of wind, styling it more than I would ever imagine she'd do for herself. Her turquois eyes staring into the distance, the speckled sunlight that filtered through the clouds basking her face in white glow. I could see all the different blemishes, bruises and spots on her skin, even a small scar near the back of her cheek. Looking at her I could tell despite how close we were in age, she had lived so much. This sky was nearest of thousands that she'd seen. I could only imagine the stories she had, the people she had met. 

Looking at her in that way, I had the strangest of thoughts. "Hazel?" I asked, before she turned to me expectantly. "You said before that I don't have any friends, but this. . . We're friends, right?"

It seemed like a stupid question, in my mind there wasn't any other word I could use to describe her. But there was something about her in this moment, something indescribable and I couldn't get the question out of my head. 'Who am I to you?'

Hazel gave me a smirk that quickly evolved into a laugh that she just couldn't hold back. She didn't need to answer the question. "You're alright rich girl." she teased, playfully punching me in the shoulder once more. 

I met her eyes for a moment as we shared another laugh, before she turned back off into the distance. Part of me wished she had said something else, but what exactly I wasn't sure. As I kept looking into her sea foam eyes, I could have sworn that as the branches above us swayed in the wind, the light passing over her brought out the smallest hint of a purple hue rippling out across her irises. Taking all of her in once more, I smiled to myself. If that's what this was, then I was happy.

After a bit of time spend in silence, enjoying the view of the garden, Hazel shuffled forward as she spoke out. "Well, since you're so worried about anyone knowing I exist, I should get going." She stood and brushed the dirt off her hands and jacket, doing nothing to improve its general cleanliness. She took a few steps forward before looking back at me. "Chris," She said warmly. "It's okay to be yourself. I'll see you around." 

With that final thought she swaggered off toward the tree line at the edge of the property. I was sad to see her go, but so glad that she came. I thought about all she had said to me, and everything I had said to her. 'It's okay to be yourself'. Even as I replayed the line in my head, another wormed its way in. 'How can you treat people the way that you do and expect them to care for you back?'. The two moments, and the those who delivered them, stood in sharp opposition in my mind. I tried to focus on Hazel as the two figures waged battle against each other. I tried to keep her face in my minds eye, her sand speckled hair flowing in the breeze, light shining on her face as she stared confidently in the distance. 'It's okay to be yourself.'  I repeated it over in my head, but even as I did there was one more moment that stood in stronger contrast to either of the other two before. 'If that were true, we wouldn't be here now would we?' I could almost hear the snap of Cynthia's fingers like the sound was still faintly echoing around in my skull. 

I sighed to myself, and stood up from my seat on the ground. I'd had enough of the garden for today. As I started to walk back inside, I stopped for a moment and looked back, remembering the book I had been reading was still lying in the dirt near where I had been sitting.

'Who cares? Its just a book, leave it.' Thought a part of me, sparking the fire of rebellion. But even as the sparks flew, I thought of Lena, offering me the book, telling me how she thought I would enjoy it. I thought of Cynthia, finding the book left behind in the dirt, and the signature smirk on her face that would accompany it. 

The spark in me petered out as I sighed and walked back to pick up the tome. Brushing it off on my sleeve, I then tucked the book into my chest and continued back towards the house. 

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Cynthia had questions. Watching Christina and her companion from a far off distance, she couldn't help but wonder who this girl was. She was a commoner, local, and confident, but those were about the only things that Cynthia could tell in this moment. Though beyond the mystery of this girl's appearance was the greater question of Christina's relation to her. There wasn't any mention of this girl in records of Christina's past, and from what everything Cynthia knew of the young girl the chances that she would voluntarily befriend a commoner was slim to none. 

Was it possible Christina had befriended this girl since coming under their care? When could that even have happened? And how did the girl come to be here at the Manor? Cynthia curled her lip in intrigue. Part of her debated if she should go confront the two of them, find out exactly what they were up to, but with too many unknowns she decided to keep her distance. 

She watched as the mystery girl stood up and departed from their ward. Cynthia at the moment was using a minor spell to avoid attention. While not making her completely invisible, it did alter the perceptions of others to make it extremely unlikely that she would be noticed.

Despite that, the girl started to turn around seemingly to scan her surroundings, and for a moment it looked like her eyes focused in on Cynthia's direction. Holding her breath for a moment, Cynthia's blood pressure spiked. She preferred that until she had the upper hand this new girl not realize that Cynthia knew of her, and the idea that this girl had possibly seen her despite the enchantment unnerved the sorceress. After moments that dragged on for what felt like minutes, the girl shrugged and continued on past the manor grounds. Cynthia let out a sigh, being able to tell that her enchantment had held. Despite the girl pausing in her direction, she remained unnoticed.

After a moment more of studying the girl as she walked off, Cynthia looked over to Christina who was still sat under the tree. The young girl watched longingly in the direction that her friend had left from, before shaking her head and mouthing something silently to herself. It was clear to the sorceress that something the girl had said affected their young ward, and Cynthia raised an eye. What was this mystery girl's intentions with Christina? What had they been talking about? Was it possible this girl and what ever relationship she had with Christina could in some way threaten what she, Lena, and Rowan were trying to build? The sorceress furrowed her brow in resolve. Surely it was nothing, but even so, it would be a good idea to keep and eye out for this girl in the future. 

After a few moments longer Christina sighed to herself, and started toward the house. Cynthia then watched as she stopped in her tracks, and looked back at the tome she had left sitting in the dirt under the tree. 

A subtle smirk crept up on Cynthia's lips. She could see the young girl wrestling with her emotions. Despite Cynthia's experience with Christina so far it continued to amaze her that something as simple as cleaning up after herself was such a struggle for the little brat. All this girl's life she had been given everything she could ever want, and now she struggled with the simplest responsibilities. Lena was right, this girl needed to be taught a better way, and Cynthia was glad that she would be the one to do the teaching. 

Though much to Cynthia's surprise, after a few moments of contemplation the young girl did return to pick up the novel. While being mildly shocked at the show of basic responsibility, it also gave the sorceress some satisfaction to know that their reinforcements of Christina's behaviour were working. Gently rubbing her middle finger and thumb together, it gave Cynthia an idea. While it was unlikely the mystery girl from before was any kind of threat to the sorceress or her family, she realized they could kill a few birds with one stone. She'd have to speak to Lena about it later to approve, but the thought of finding new ways to exercise her magical talents excited her. 

She looked over to Christina making her way back inside the house, book tucked tight to her chest and head hung low. Cynthia nodded approvingly before turning away herself. As she walked away, she hummed to herself cheerfully. Twiddling her fingers, she absent mindedly wove a basic energy enchantment around her fingertips before flicking it away in the direction of the tree's at the edge of the property. The small purple ball of arkane launched out into the brush, rustling through the branches, and startling a small flock of birds, who let out a low gravel worn cry before their silky black silhouettes shot out into the sky away from the manor grounds. Cynthia chuckled to herself; Christina was coming along very nicely.